I just finished buying groceries and, as I began driving home, I saw a familiar sight: In the supermarket parking lot, a dad and his young daughter were sitting in the trunk of a hatchback car, feet dangling. The dad was holding a tub of ice cream and spooning out globs of goodness. Some went into his mouth, some into the mouth of his daughter. They were chilling, enjoying the trunk life, together.
There are times when life seems to be constantly pulling us onto roller coasters, urgent and intense rides that roar for our attention – and as soon as we get off one ride, we are sucked right onto the next one. Preparing for a court hearing about how much time we spend with our kid, figuring out holiday plans for the newly split family, worrying about feeling lonely for the rest of our lives, which of course is exactly when the washer/dryer breaks down and we are concerned about money…
The roller coasters will keep coming. The signs above them will keep flashing. They’re important issues, sure, but so is the quality of your life and, above all else, so is the quality of your connection with your kids. Being able to enjoy simple time with them, taking a break from life to sit together and share ice cream, is an incredible gift that you are giving yourself, your child, and your relationship.
These are the moments that set the tone of your relationship, and that calibrate the nervous system of the person that your child is growing into. You are teaching your child, through example and experience, that it’s always possible to enjoy life, to be content with the simple and profound pleasures all around us To be present with each other and share in the delight of quiet enjoyment. Or loud enjoyment! Or silly enjoyment! Life doesn’t need to be serious and mission-oriented all the time, and neither do we. I am a huge fan of impromptu picnics, spontaneous snack breaks, and happenstance happiness.
So stop and smell the ice cream as you are leaving the supermarket. Life will wait. Your child is here, with you, now. Take time to enjoy this world and each other.
